Someone gave me a card yesterday and I had to disagree with most of the meaningful and well-intended words that he wrote. It wasn't that hard. It was, often for me, a selfish feeling. I almost always felt I should be doing something with or for Dustin, or around the house or the yard, or the never-ending work that this there in this day of management by technology, or visiting my family out of town.
It was actually more isolating and lonely than I ever imagined it. Partially that's due to the rest of the life I lead, and the reality that I had to fit it in when I could and couldn't have planned to work around someone else's schedule too, it just wouldn't have happened.
Will it be a satisfying experience? Can't answer that one. I know I won't regret it, but I might have outgrown some of the things that made it a tough experience this year. Like this race, where the goal is always to be moving forward, I need to know that I am and sometimes lately in these last 11 months I've wondered that.
There's no way to go through something that causes so much internal focus without being different and realizing what works and what doesn't in your life.
It's easy, really. The things that keep you up at night and that make you cry, not once, but repeatedly, are things that have to be resolved and eliminated if you're going to be satisfied at the end of this race. To have regrets that last for years is too much to ask of anyone.
Training is simple and clean and clear. It makes the rest just that way as well. You prepare, you work through it and you get better. You don't get better by repeating the same mistakes or by avoiding logging the miles.
All the secrets are there in the training schedule.
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